Wednesday, May 1, 2013

Timing

One of the many benefits of being a part of Pound the Pavement for Parenthood is the opportunity I have of meeting so many good people. All of these people will make incredible parents someday, but for whatever reason, for now, they have to wait. (see there, blessings of infertility, meeting the good people of the world)
  
Over the last few weeks it seems the topic of 'timing' keeps coming up.  And it's got me thinking...about my own infertile situation, about the couples we help through PPP, and about...life.

Timing. It's a funny thing.  If you're like me at all, timing is a bother.  Period.  I like to plan. I like to know exactly what's coming next. I like to feel like I'm ready for it.  So, really, timing and me butt heads. Like constantly.

Looking back though, life just works out the way it does, regardless of how much we worry, plan, or prepare.  And most often, it absolutely works out for the better.  We become better people through the process of giving up our own will and trying to make the best of what comes.  The outcome is better than we ever could've planned or prepared for.  In the end, timing wins every stinkin' time.  

So now, when I feel like I'm about to butt heads yet again with timing, I try to step back, and just hope.  I hope that I'm patient while I wait for the world to work itself out, just like it always does.  I hope that I learn the lessons that always seem to accompany frustrated timing.  More than anything though, I hope that I can continue meeting so many good people, who consistently make their way into my life and help me become good in the process. Their timing has always been perfect.

There's always a plan better than mine.
There's always a time better than mine.
There's always people around, better than me.
And for that, I'm grateful.


2 comments:

  1. So glad I found this blog finally--every post is amazing! :)

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  2. Jill,
    Don't know that you remember me {Allen's cousin's wife}, but I felt I had to stop by to say thanks. I've read your blog since I found it a few years ago. I remember sympathizing, but not fully understanding the frustration and sadness of infertility. I had no trouble getting my first two daughters here and never really expected to experience issues with getting pregnant again. Sadly, trouble has cropped up while trying to grow our family. We've spent nearly a year now trying for a third child to make our family feel more complete and we just can't seem to make it work. I've read back through several of your posts and can suddenly empathize rather than only sympathize. Many of the posts speak to me now in ways they never did before.
    Unfortunately, we're in a place in our lives that infertility doctors, tests and treatments are simply not options. So we wait.
    A wonderful lady in our ward spoke recently about "waiting upon the Lord." And she had such a great perspective on it that I thought I would share. She mentioned that too many people "wait FOR the Lord" by simply asking and then they sit idly waiting for answers or miracles. She then said that she has begun to think of the word "wait" as an action verb similar to what a waiter or butler would do. Waiters and butlers "wait upon" their customers or patrons by serving them. They don't dwell on their own needs, but focus on those who've been put in their path. She said "When we think of 'waiting' in that way, it suddenly shifts from what we expect from the Lord to what the Lord expects of us. This leaves the passive waiting behind and requires service and activity from us."
    I am trying hard to change my attitude about waiting for the miracle that I want the Lord to send. I'm trying hard to wait UPON the Lord, seeing what He needs me to do to wait upon Him and others while I look forward to the answers to my prayers.
    I think you've already figured this out. You didn't sit around simply waiting for your miracle. You found a way to serve the Lord and bless others while praying and hoping and working for your own blessing. I think Pound the Pavement and the blog are exactly what He needed you to do.
    I think I join many others in saying Thank You for your service and your "waiting."
    ...Angie

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